Eugenics? Mind Control? Biological pharmacology.

I seriously feel that there is a boldfaced unhidden Eugenics agenda in many countries now.. if it be Illiminati or some other shadow organisation it is thus- some of the prinicipals of the Eugenics is so ingrained in the first half of the 1900's in AMERICA as a form of dealing with forms of humanity as "unwanted" or "unworthy" such as sterilisation of those deemed as such.

Nazi idiology took that even a step farther.. making so called scientific basis for their determination of those qualities of those "unworthy of life".. and today using these so called "scientific" techinques we discover the pharmacological market is taking up all of these practices where these two ideas of "worthyness" takes over.

I see it this way, they control people by the pharmicological alterations.. young children diagnosed with ADHD, and many of these other things which forciblely say in the US that children who have such a disorder will not have the right to school if they do not take medicines which are not only danerous for them but will change the structure of the development of the brain.. I believe that this helps with the process of "mind control" as to totally change the brain is a form of that.

I think there were a few cases of children put into foster care in the States and because of so called behaviour problems force drugs like these.. but not limited to harder substances for other numberless disorders.

Not only that but the willingness of people to accept that they have a problem such as a "chemical imballance" is also a part of this mind control..its like giving the control over your body and mind over to someone else who says "this drug will cure all your anxieties and mental problems" and then accepting, paying and swallowing the poison they give. This is a part of the child of the Eugenics movement- psychology.. to find a biological basis for people to be deemed mentally ill. So right, there is a biological basis for my "synastisae", its the biological structure of the brain and nervious system.. right? It is super connectiviness of the nerves.... the seeing of sound, the feeling of sound, hearing of sensations.. (I had this really brilliant sounding headache the other day, it hurt really bad but it was very musical, and sounded like bells) but then I don't as annoying as it can be at times being that sensitive and hearing something that makes me momentarily blind can happen but not often.. should I be forced to take medicine to make it go away? Because it is different, is this not a biological based mental disorder.. and if I take some drugs that block the overflow of neurological impulses to other sensations, could it make me "normal" and less distracted and even "smarter".. dealing with all the massive disctractions and painful need to focus at times?

Oh well that was just another side line.. I haven't written for a while you see.. the sensation of my emotions is pressing me to go farther with my train of though.. the emotions which are brilliant to the artist.. the death of the conformist who only wants to be like everyone else (even if normality is a myth- part of the mind control they play upon us via media every freaking day if you dare to look at any given program on television).


On a package of your typical antibiotics (to save lives) there are a number of warnings.. people are asked to be careful with them.. but I am overwhelmed with the percentages of people willingly putting brain altering substances such as Valium, Prozac, Zoloft, Ridalin and other drugs, daily into their bodies because some psychologist schooled in Freudian psychology thinks that aniexity or energy is a bad thing and disturbs people.. when its just the system which doesn't allow for the development of people which is the issue.

I won't even get into these new ideas about "bi polar" or Lithium, and various other so called "anti psychotics" (they are not only toxic, but expected to be taken by people on a daily basis... because its the "psychosis" which is dangerous, not the fact that if you take these meds on a daily basis you will shorten your life expectation by 20 years) (obviously a Eugenics point as well as side effects which lead to death or lack of sexual energy)

Sooner or later people will wake up.. but with the combinations of school systems, conformity, television and ideas about what people should feel like or work like (not only that but what you should look like too) I get the impression that mind control is much more common just staring you in the face if you even look around you.. and all these ideas have been here living with us all for the past hundred years, because before then, you pretty much had system which had places for people to cope, within the typical structure of things.

Now an artifical doctrine of forcibly drugging children who are anxious because they never see their parents or don't understand what is happening is going on, and these things were never in effect in the amount of the years previous to only 100 years ago. It was only because nature took over (in the sense if you don't look after and fed and care for your children they would die) even if women and children were beaten the psychosis or idea of it was not as much as in the recent years.

Death was a part of every day life in the sense that if you were to get sick, there was a possiblity you could die unexpectedly.. and we weren't talking about anxiety about driving a car or going to school.. but life and death.. so basicly people had less to really worry about other than that death was always waiting.

I think it helps people to devolop better relationships with people if they really understand this idea.. that A. you don't want to hang around with people you don't like because life is too short; and B. you don't want to lose that love, or opportunity, or chance by fearing commitments and looking for something better to come along.. because you can't live life like that.. even if they did instruct girls to always be chast- not many people waited until over the age of 20 to be married or become a part of a partnership.. wether aranged or based in love. Well its the idea of that it SHOULD work that way.

(Commitment is the new "Death" we fear the most.. the losing of ourselves because we have already lost so much of who we are by the time the first years of school have been finished with us and we wish to be MORE than just another number.. but then the expresson of fear of aloneness also kicks in for many who cling hard to relationships that don't support their expression as who they are because that too is the same coin, so you will see relationship phobics jump from one relationship to another faster than they can change their underpants and still exclaim they don't want to be alone but they don't want to commit.)

Fear of commitment is part of our anxieties.. the anxiety to let people be close inspite of the fact we need friends and family and people who we can trust ourselves with...most see independence as a strength rather than weakness but within most of the independence I see, I see a sense of distance.. the more intrenched one gets in "pulling his own weight", the more I see the perspective of that "everyone SHOULD pull his own weight".. so the empathy for the misfortunate turns often to an indignant "oh I will help.. but they must be WORTHY"... and this attitude can easily shift from that to "I can't help them, they are not WORTHY".

If the person who's "independance" and success had come from a background of struggle and less opportunities, the struggle leaves marks of bitter justification and hard hearteness towards people in similar sitatuations.. in fact I have found more people who came from my background with hardship have become basicly hateful towards those less fortunate based upon "I struggled and no one helped me, so why should I help you.." attitude.

I read this into a institutionalized attitude over all of coldness and lack of feeling for anyone but small babies (and cute animals occasionally).. and those of course are given away at the mother's expense for the price of having that child to escape poverty and hardship. (personally I recommend any woman who NEEDS to give a child up for adoption to seriously consider other options where they can keep the baby..especially IF they wouldn't have given their child away for any other reason aside for hardship and poverty and the fear of being a single parent all alone.)

Now I have an anxiety.. I see the future of people apparently searching for children to complete their lives, in spite of the fact they have chemically drenched themselves in the poision which stopped them from passing on their genetics.. taking in a child or two and exposing them to the same toxic environment dependent upon one chemical or another. Or people having children and given false diagnosis of post partum depression and given massive drugs for them to cope (thinking about the instance of a woman in New Zeeland complaning about back pain to her GP and told she had post partum depression!! I fell down the stairs and had a back pain.. someone I dare you to lable THAT post partum depression! Later on the woman was put on drugs and still had back pain.. after 3 years on antipsycotics they found out she had a slipped disc and was trying to get off the meds because they wrecked her life and her relationship to her husband and her child as a person-- note also a function of isolation, much like the preparing the ground for mind control.)

I have an anxiety that a number of people like me.. statisticly won't have children because of anxiety or failure of commitment as the norm... after all you need a commitment to something to have a child in your life- otherwise you will fail to give them the ground basis for future development.. that one thing to hold structure.. not just that but the basics of love, attention, worthyness. When other people judge what worthyness is on, soley upon a biological or economic worth.. the numbers or the varity of points of view beging to dwindle and conformity and even rabid hate of the different grows so well within the untouched unrealised soul.

I've made a link to the artical that inspired my train of thought here.. it really isn't completly part wholeness of the issues addressed.. and I addressed a few of my own personal agendas instead- after all the personal IS political.

The idea of many a great and MISSING empire..

I didn't say this, I was not here.

Speaking with my son over a book about cats, we peered into pages.. there the Abyssian cat with golden fur and powerful stance was a life sized cat portrait and my son with all his wisdom pointed and said "that cat looks just like a lion"...a bit more of a puzzle that was on my mind's back side..

Consider this information with grave concern... Today's country Eithiopia was once the great empire of Abyssia.. the Lion of Eithiopia may really have been a small house cat all along.. and thus we think to ourselves about the re written maps of the world.. and the loss of the mighty by the lost translation.

Think think think.. do you know today's names of the empires of old? What IS Persia now? Where is Siam on the map? and why have these names been erased?... People love to quote the bible for the lands of Babylon.. and Isreal.. but since the last few centuries the names have been consistantly eradicated from daily langauge, and you have to wonder what the motive for that is..

I won't go into it any deeper than that but then there is another problem on my personal mind... not that of the erasure of powerful histories for the sake of a small group to maintain power over history, and the re writing it to suit the needs to create "examples" of what has been will always be because we have evidence and can control history. Ok thats pretty freaking big, or what?

I had a dream the other night right after I woke up from one dream where I met Robert Lywellyn and he was a rather nice person and a good friend.. but then I had this dream which had nothing to do with it but continued on with him there.. in character as Kryton but not really..

The last thing I said to Robert in the last dream was.. "If you like AlterEgoTrip on youtube, you will LOVE my Second Life Avatar".. and it was a funny thing and we laughed... because the reason I said that was he cheared me up.. and so I pretty much decided to invite him to friend me in SL.

Anyway in the next dream there were these women, young three of them, but two of them were not major rolls.. just friends to the one young lady who was bent on fighting with me.. and a small boy and a cat.. in a house.. and Robert was there for some reason. I was constantly being hit in the back by the woman.. she was young, thin and pretty but was so angry with me for some odd reason I didn't understand why but I kept stopping to "get her off my back" finally I got tired of this passive blocking and put her arms around her back with my knee to her back and said... "Stop hitting me!!!" and finally her two friends showed up and got angry with me and said... "you're hurting her, can't you see she's not well and has cancer..?" And with that I released her arms and let her go gently and said.. "just tell her to stop hitting me and punching me in the back.." and then they finally left..

Meanwhile there was this little boy telling a story of how his family used to live in this house.. and for some reason there was a twinge of a history there.. as this was a house that in the future was to have all kind of events.. and yet they haven't happened YET.. but when he said that and was gently holding a pet cat.. I could see that this boy needed to change his future or something bad was going to happen but the women in the house were not interested in listening to me but instead would rather argue with me and each other.

After all these conflicts with me in them were resolved, Robert and I walked over to a different location which was like a Red Dwarf set in a way.. and then over there was the arrival of someone considered a "hyper human" or a quantum human..and I thought to myself that time travel had changed them in some way to creating them into a different species..even the way it was written it was like Human with a mathimatical equasion relating to the power of 3.. Human squared or something like that.. and we knew that what I had to do was resolve the conflict earlier and then remove the boy from the situation....in fact my own pain was nothing personal it was just a part of the "journey" I had to take for the investigation, thus the fighting.

And I was told by Robert out of character (and not dressed as Kryton either) that he would leave me a signal to tell me when the present begins again.. as a litmus test to see if the changes had taken effect, as it would be difficult to tell or recall events after changing things and then Holly (the female version) said, we have a problem, we may not have enough energy left for the time jump..but that we had to risk it for that small change.

(ok insane dreams)..not to forget that I talk all too much about one of my fave youtube people.. but never mind.

Medicine or Drugs?

I don't like taking the inhaled cortizone.. its become easier.. and since they made me take a minimal of 2 doses 2 times a day on a normal day.. its been kind of hard with the side effects.

Then taking this Singular.. is also a part of it.. but this year the allowance for meds (which is somewhere around 2000 kronor) has been exceeded yet again.. due to allot of antibiotics as well as the expense of the two daily meds.

I don't think I would have wanted to choose taking medicine to "maintain" a certain ablity to breathe.. but at the same time.. other people who let their asthma slide down can't even ride a bicycle anymore according to some of the things I read.. so what they are trying to do is maintain a level of quality I'm supposed to have.. and I think to be honest.. for as sick as I was recently (which my family politely was blind to) I think I maintained so much better than the last two times last year.. it was misery.

Now I just got over a Microbiotic infection in the lungs.. I don't want to call it puemonia but thats what the doctor calls it.. I have had colds which ran longer I guess.. but still I'm at least able to walk around.. take the boy to school, and even push myself to skate..I have however some evidence on occasion showing me that I'm not as well off as I think, muscle spasms.. foot, leg, arm, hand, back, neck CRAMPS.. they are everywhere!!

But yes I don't think of myself as sick so its deceptive.. today I'm finally at close to 90% of my 90%... the increments I use to define where I stand are as such.. I haven't come back to 100%.. although in Brighton I was close and the same with Idol.. I was close but still not 100%.. and I'm trying to ignore the percent I'm missing.

It bothers me..I don't want to be in this situation... but I'm doing stuff to work against it, its just that everyone expects more from me than I can give, and yes.. I can't say no.. that is with my family because in spite of their blindness to my problems.. I love them.

Hope they love me too!!!

Its been about 5 months since I had an asthma attack.. which isn't a problem if I'm awake.. the problem is that I've only had them in my sleep.. and this is where I'm weakest... because when you wake up and can't breathe.. its allot just to try to calm down enough to make sense out of what is happening. If I start feeling bad when I'm awake, its a given I can relax my breathing.. take the emergency medicine.. and physically calm myself down. It doesn't work this way when sleeping.. thats for damned sure.. but its starting to.

I still don't like this because I can't really see the practically of me having to take stuff when civilisation colapses and I find myself without inhaled steriods.. and this is why its important for me to try to find a way to heal myself (and others) so they need no medicines.. and all I can see is a bit of the weakness of the why an illness befalls people but still question how to do the work..

Its a complex situation..because not all illness is spirt as some people believe but I do think some of it is partially to blame...just partially, after all you have to have the occasion, the oportunity for it to happen..

I think I will go listen to a Damned record.. since Doctor Metropolis's music made me think heavily of The Damned and for some reason Be Bop Deluxe... WTF?

my new blogg dealing with vitual experices

I launched my "Other" blogg.. because its about time to talk about the experiences that I have had in a collective virtual community I will create videos on the topic.. have contributions and interviews..but I most of all wish to take a philosophical journey where the idea of things as matterial only is no longer valid.

When I get a gift or a prise in a vitual world.. did I actually get anything at all.. a person close to me would argue.. "fake things in a fake world.." but I argue back.. with the following questions:

"What is real? Is an idea real? Is a website something you pay for.. is that something unreal? Is contact via a telephone, more or less real than contact via other methods? Is anything "real" in need of being measured in a sensory quantified way or is anything that isn't measured by matterial means logically "unreal" or "fake"?"

With this in mind.. its easy to poke holes in lots of ideas such as faith and love, religion, belief systems.. but we all come back to perception with them.. so thinking differently about it all.. its not always a winning blow for the athesists.. because this is about anyone who is stuck in a mindset where all things must be defined by the here and now.. and quantity.

But my happy drug, my happy pill is not a pill.. but a state of mind.. also immeasurable.. like love.. one of the most important unquantifiable "things" in the world. What about "words"? People every day pay for words.. words are huge buisness for those who know how to use them or sell them..

Useless words fill up books and make huge amounts of money.. for the "right people".. but here I am.. thinking of Douglas Adams.. someone who's words filled books... many many books.. and filled the air when he spoke. I think that he may have approved of this different reality since his creation of Starship Titanic was very much in line with the ideas of a vitual interactive world. Even his writings had more innovative interactive creations than in any of the William Gibson books.. Adams wanted to just create "Starship Titantic" without a book but his publishers wouldn't allow for it.. so he pretty much made someone else write it.. because he didn't want to deal with writing but rather brainstorming and creating.

Yes.. in a world where Myst and Riven were very popular, Starship Titanic the video game was an intersting interactive situation where you would actually interact with the characters. Some people have taken it much farther and have created whole world games on SL.. making it an interactive gaming world, but they stick to their rules insanely, is the complaint..

I want some of that feeling I stepped into a new place.. I like the feeling of being a bit of an armchair adventurer whilst cliff diving and chatting with friends.. its an awesome feeling to see an image of yourself doing things you would never dare to do.. or maybe not fully dressed in an evening gown doing!!!

:)so this is why I decided to make a new blogg! To cover that "unreal" area of my "life".. and stay totally virtuous..

Secondhand Daylight

Sitting around thinking about what word associations come to mind when saying the phrase "Secondhand Daylight"... the title of a Magazine album..

Yes.. I think I have enough secondhand daylight. For now anyway.

I'm happy to say..

Bring it on you silly pansey.. I'm going to print up your letters if you give me any trouble. Got it? Spam me and you will be tracked down like the dog you are. Have a nice day!! Oh and the word pansey is far too good for you, but I have no need to call you what I really want to, as I don't think that will help your anger issues.. :D

sunday night's dream

I dreamt I was supposed to do something, something with a boat, and so I needed to put down a deposit for it, using a credit card.. this boat was a huge cargo ship, and there was a deadline, but the problem of the deadline was there was a huge storm with huge swells and overwhelmingly rough seas.. and there was no way to dock this huge ship.. I was thinking all along the way about the music for "I am a whale" for a project I was thinking of working on.

Because of the stormy seas I was naturally delayed, but what could I do? There was nothing to fight against due to the fact, one can not fight against the weather, one has to wait it out.. no point in being frustrated either...The seas were nearly black and the boat was being tossed about, but the only thing I could do was stay on a steady course at sea until there was an opening for docking and delivering my cargo. All the while when I was out at land and yet navigating the ship at the same time, I was observing from outside of the situation. And people would come up to me and say how brave I was.. and one said it was like personally getting out there and swimming with the sharks.

Still waiting it out I guess..


***************

Next dream just under the situation of a nap (I do need those!) I was dreaming I was working very hard under the day and when I got home, I took off my head (as though even my body was removable.. like some kind of costuming) and then I noticed something and it was a little star-like creature attached to my head.. it was like sea life.. very fine and transparent but also light and feathery like a baby jellyfish but with the tendrils like a barnacle..and it took a look at it, and it was hovering there over my head, from my physical body.. and I had to ask it, had it been there all along? And I motioned it over to me, standing in front of a mirror, and it could be seen along with my "real body" or other body.. and it was like an iceberg in the sense that even though it had a physical presence it had invisible physical presence.. hyper dimensional with its dimensions stretching into various places, both physical and not apparently physical. And it finally after I spoke to it it answered me.. and was like a pair of lips whispering in my ear, which were not as seen as its barnacle feathers opened and closed like speaking lips.. and it said.. "I want to be with you.." and then it's invisible tendrils grabbed me all over my nerves and said "I like being with you..it feels nice here"

I won't get into the other details though.. but when I woke up or about to wake up, it was like I was growing wings or something.. like this creature was a "halo" over my head and it's merging with my astral, physical, hyper dimensional body was creating me to grow differently.. but the sensation of sprouting wings was both pleasing and uncomfortable at the same time. And now it feels like my senses are under constant attack of sensations.. vibrations, which previously were there, but I am becoming even more aware of.

This doesn't explain however this constant need to move the top mattress back every night until last night where I FELT that mattress move right under me.. making it difficult to sleep...if this is a sign I'm in trouble.. please someone let me know.